Religious Vs Moral Dilemma - Need advice!!!!

Alrite Bhoys / Ghirls!!

Lets me start by saying that if you couldn'y be arsed for a long read... sorry to dissapoint!!! This is one!
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Most of you know me a short poster on this website, i've never disclosed (as far as i know!!??) anything personal on this forum, but what im about to tell you is probably the closest, most personal thing I hold... and i need your advice.

My story is....

As a child I grew up in the Ardoyne area of Belfast. For you who don't know it is the Republican heart-land of North Belfast, and alosng with the Falls, of the 'The North'.

I'm 22 and have seen some terrible time in and around my area.

When I was 4 most of the stuff going on around me was shielded my my 3 older sisters, the torubles were something that happened on the news, and the 'bangs' around the district were ''the boys'' at work... no questions asked even for a 4 year old.

My Father was a Taxi driver and my Mother a housewife, not unusal for the deprived, suppressed area that Ardoyne was. I always knew my mother hated my father taxi-ing in those times, simply, and bluntly, due to the ease of loyalist paramilitries of British Army attacks on advertised **Republican/Nationalists (**believe it or not, depending on which depot you drove for!?!).

Anyway, to cut a long story short, my father, one evening after tea, was called to pick a lady up at the maternity unit of the Mater Hospital, and take her home.
That 'Lady' nor my Father, was to return home that night.

My Father raced to the hospital to help, what he thought was a lady who needed help, only to find himself ambushed by Loyalist gunmen. As mentioned before, my father drove for a 'Republican' depot, and so was a sitting duck for the gunmen involved.

That's my stroy so far... now comes my recent dilemma and question to you guys....

I'm Now 22. I'm a nurse working in the Cardiac Unit in the Royal Victoria Hospital in Belfast. I have never left Belfast and never will... I love it here and alwasys will!

Since I was young and my Father was taken I have alwasys wondered what i would do if I, personally could take justice on the offenders. It was only natural to have these thoughts IMO. I'm not going to lie, Is thought the worst of worst thought towards these people. They took my Dad...

Again, cutting a long story short... Throughout my years, i worked hard and got yself into very 'hairy' situations to find out who shot my Dad. I got a name and later got this confirmed by a senior, ex-member of the Loyalist Paramilitary involved.

In worked last night, on a ward in which I was alone, a man went into caridac arrest (heart attack) on the floor in front of me. In my hand was a medical, with the name at the top, of my father's killer.

Without a single milli-second, I did what i had to, and I would like to believe, what should have done.

** EDIT (i perfromed emergency CPR and called for the crash team... then further assisted in the theatre when the operation was carried out)

The man today lives, his family by his side and he will recover from anear fatal heart attack.

He was the man that killed my dad... and its not circumstancial... i know it for a fact.

But the question i have for you lot, and i want a honest answer as that was the most honest thing ive ever written, was he worth it??

 

What did you do exactly mate? And what do you mean was he worth it?

 

Sorry mate, I preformed emergency first aid and called the crash arrest team. laymans terms i save his life...

also assisted in the emergency op he ad afterwards!

He took my father?? was he worth saving?

 

mate, no matter what he did, he has a family that you could have taken him from, they don't deserve it and i know you didn't deserve to lose your dad but the troubles were founded on 'an eye for an eye' scernario and you should take solace in the fact that you didn't lower yourself to people like thats level, you deserve great respect mate, well done and thanks for sharing

 

Crazy story there Belfast_Bhoy. I could understand your motives in leaving him to die I am sure there are many others out there who in your position would have left him to die.

You proved you are a better human being than him by saving him a very brave thing to do in my opinion.

Thanks for sharing that story as well I can imagine it being a hard thing to do.

 

Wow, firstly that's an amazing story. I can really relate to part of it aswel. My dad's brother was a taxi driver working for a depot in the Short Strand and the exact same thing happened to him. Went out to work one night to earn a living for his family, never to return. He went to the address which turned out to be an empty house. He just presumed that the wrong number or something came through to him on the radio so waited a few minutes to see if it was meant to be one of the other houses instead. Then loyalists shot at him from the house.

Anyway, as for your diliemma, I think that you did the right thing.

 

personally i would have done what you had done as it would seem to me as the right thing to do, but i, and most people wouldnt have been in your situation regarding your father so its hard for me to know what i really would have done. if you know what i mean. but imo killing is wrong and you did the right thing.

 

* sake ,i can only imagine from afar what your going through.

Your a nurse ,and you done your job correctly ,and he is alive because of you ,and he has his family around him , because its personal to you its eating away at you ,should i have bothered saving his life ,your a nurse and your job is to help people if you ignored that man you wouldnt be in a job .

I admire your honesty ,and you as a person rose above evil ,you are a better person than that man will ever be .im sure your father would be proud of you ,and your family ,is he worth throwing away your life mate ,ask yourself that ,and then make a decision ,are you married ,have children ,etc its not just about you my friend .

The man you saved ,has got to live with what he has done ,i said earlier i can only imagine ,they times past where terrible and you and many people where affected by it all ,go and seek someone to talk to mate ,someone that has been through the same as you ,maybe a sister or your mother ,or go to an outsider .

I dont know the answer for you ,but your filled with anger and rightly so ,but you have made a move by asking for help on here ,good man ,someone might put you straight ,but you have got to be admired for what you did .

 

You proved that you were a better human being than the lowlife * that killed your Dad.

In days to come, you should write to this guy, telling him what he did and telling him what you did. Then tell him to live the rest of his life knowing that he has a * big bill to pay when he dies, but that you have found the strength and humanity to save his life, that whatever he did he didnt kill your dads spirit, or your hope, and that he has utterly failed, both in his pathetic political aims, and as a human.

Let him take that to his grave.

You have avenged your Dad, but not in the way you expected. A life for a life -except you saved his, and by that, you took it for your own.

Sleep well tonight my friend.

 

Thanks for an unbielievable response!!!

Friday night, you lot shoud be out gettin blizted!!

Im here tonight with my Fiancée and my 1 year old son, with whom i have discussed it already. She , like all of you has supported my in my discisson to help the guy survive.

That, basically is my job descriptsion, I have to do what i can to help the poorly get better without prejudice or judgment. Its not my place!!??!!

Can i just say that some the remarks made so far are just soooo strengthening, its amazing,

Thank You...

Raf, Rebel, Claire, Larrson, POP and Mo Chara Kenny Dal

 

Goodnight, kiss your lady and your son for us all.

Your son has a dad to be proud of, just like you do.

 

The lowlife might not have been worth saving but by doing the right thing you've saved your own soul.

He'll come before * and get what he deserves for what he has done in his life.

When you come before *, however, the Big Man himself will tell you that you have done the right thing.

 

Sorry mate, i was tryin to do a serious thread here.... jst seems like u want me to go to bed!!??


ONLY JOKIN...

Thanks, I really appreciate you comments POP,
Goodnight, and * Bless!!

 

I'm too late maybe to add anything different. You proved your humanity, your goodness. Well above the type that took your dad. (RIP). It would be fitting for the loyalist to know who saved his life though. But again that would open things up again. I don't know about that, but I do know you did a good thing in itself.

 

Some serious dilemmas for you, all those emotions running around your head. What to do legal and illegal and then you have your profession and its moral obligation and you upheld that with distinction.

I dunno what I'd do, I'm not in your boots, I can look at the situation but i'll always be using my values/experience to judge not someone that has faced those days.

I'd talk/confront the man, tell him your story and maybe you can get some reconciliation from it. You have your family now, thats what your father would want to you to put first, not to avenge his memory.

Remember that your father died trying to do the right thing.

Hail Hail!

 

I agree with the sentiment of Dempsey is saying but again there is weighing up the pors and cons of perhaps confronting a person who does not want that. then there is the fact that they know that you know, and the suspicions that this might spark. I don't know what I'd do either tbh, but although I agree with the idea of recociliation where possible, these other thoughts run through my mind too. I'm still in no doubt you did a good thing.

 

I think you performed an amazing deed, it must have taken every ounce of courage and human spirit you possess to have done that, and fair * play to ye. It's nice to hear, what with all the * going on in the world today, that there are some genuinely decent, thoughtful people around. It just gives you that wee bit of extra faith in humanity to keep believing.
Some of the other posters have suggested you let the guy know but I actually think it would demean your act somewhat. If he finds out from someone else, fair enough. To me, a good deed is worth so much more if done quietly (that's Catholic humility for ya). Just give yerself a wee pat on the back every day.
Well done mate.

Hail Hail!

 

you know you did the right thing. this means you had a strong grip on your humanity, when most would have given way to anger. you're a strong man. cheers for posting this.

 

You are a better person than I, and I am under no delusion to try to say the contrary. Well done for doing the right thing. For me the political reasons don't change what I would have done... but I doubt I would have been as noble as yourself.

 

I'm lost for words... You are quite arguably a saint amongst men. Your father would be proud of you.