Functional alcoholism

Don't know if many of you are aware of this term, basically it describes someone who has an alcohol dependency but isn't at the level many people associate alcoholism with, i.e. sitting in the pub all day or drinking bottles of vodka in the house, not working because of it or whatever. In comparison the functional alcoholic will have a job, maybe even a wife and kids, and still be able to fit in drinking around their normal lives by maybe going home and having a bottle of wine or six pints every night.

The reason I bring it up is because I'm fairly certain my mate falls into this bracket. I'm not wanting to chastise him for it but he will finish work at 4.30, get home and change then insist on meeting at 5.30 for a few pints once a week. He then meets other mates on most other nights of the week so he always has someone to go drinking with.

I've been doing this with him for three years but am at the point where I can't be bothered feeling crap the next day now so often. I feel a loyalty to this guy as he sort of was there for me when I had health issues which cost me my job and most of my social life a while ago, and as well as that I don't have other pals or at least those that I meet on a regular basis so I enjoy it up to a point, but I think he only wants a drinking buddy. He only really contacts me to arrange the next meet and gets tetchy with me if I say I don't want to meet for any reason. Not only that but he has a bad temper when sober funnily enough, almost like a drink calms him down, and can make scenes when out and about trying to provoke arguments over nothing with either me sometimes or bar staff, or just generally walking about the streets swearing too loudly.

I don't really know what to do. I'm going to suggest meeting less but I know he'll keep trying to get me to meet weekly even if he is fine with that idea initially. Does anyone else recognise this behaviour or have experience of dealing with it?

 

I mean if it was just you he was meeting once a week for drinks thats fine, its what i do. I always try and meet up with some mates on a friday or saturday every week, its what people do to de-stress after a long week.

In fact i insist on doing it once a week, i think im a functional alcoholic on a weekend, i need my weekly fix! The fact he needs drinking buddies every day of the week suggests more deeper lying problems i think.

Think you need to put the foot down one of the times and just say no i can't do it this week.

 

I was a full fledged Alcoholic by 17, would wake up at 5am and have about quarter of a bottle of Vodka or whisky before I had work at 6am, then would carry secret bottles of booze in with me and drink all day at work.
Shameful and embarrassing the things I did when I was younger. I Lost 99% of School mates. One stuck around

 

If you drink more than 3-4 units per day, everyday, then technically you are a problem drinker.

6 pints is about 12 units of alcohol, so aye, I would say he has a problem- but functional alcoholics can go years and years, and they'll get by, but eventually it'll catch up with them, or it will escalate and they'll be full blown alcoholics, or they'll cut down to more reasonable levels like normal folk.

If you go out with him, does he insist that you drink alcohol?

Maybe just say you're cutting back a bit, cause you want to get a bit healthier or something.

 

I had a ex-mate that had a drinking problem this is going back about ten years or so. I guess he could be called functional alcoholic he became worse and worse and his attitude and behaviour deteriorated. Basically it came to head when we were on a lads holiday in Ibiza and I was sharing a room with him, as none of my other mates wanted to share with him. He was making a fool of himself, he lacked confidence with women and this lead to him being angry at his own perceived failure with them. I told him that he was being a * and his drinking was the main problem that his life was a failure. He never forgave me for it and we drifted apart but I have been told by other mates that was the best thing for him to hear, as he cut down his drinking.

I would say be straight with him tell him and don't support his drink problem as he won't thank you for it he will hate you for it in the end. Sometimes it's best to stop being his mate until he sees the error of his ways.

 

I have a couple of mates like that.

If you meet him less often, he'll drink with someone else, so that doesn't really help him. Maybe if you say to him that you're not wanting to go for a drink because you've already had a drink that week and suggest something else that doesn't involve alcohol, he'll realise that drinking every night isn't healthy.

 

Aye, that's what I'd do.

 

Jack torrance has came back with a great solution for you. Have you got a mrs? Just tell him your mrs is * off with you drinking during the week. Your also trying to get in shape. If you have the balls tell him he is drinking too much. He must have a decent job to be out at the pub most nights. Im sure he wouldn't want to lose it.

 

Anyone here have a drink problem? I'm a binge drinker. When i get started i can drink a shitload. If ive ran out i would even consider tanning a bottle of aftershave. I dont crave it on a daily basis though.

 

I have said to him before I think he has a dependency and he just said he was a "social drinker", I've brought it up a couple of times since in smaller ways and he says he doesn't drink much which I know is false just going by what he tells me normally and also what I heard from his cousin. I just think he's in denial as he is getting hip replacement soon due to it but doesn't acknowledge the link.

He still lives at home so I guess that's where the money comes from. Having said that he wasn't working for a good couple of years and still had money to go out four nights a week at least, despite not even signing on for part of it. Dunno if he's getting money off his dad or something.

 

When i drink once a week it is to excess, when i go out on a friday to the pub i can't 'just' go to the pub from 9-12 then go home, i need to go to a club or bar till 2/3 in the morning. So its kind of like when i start i like to keep going.

I don't crave drinking either, sitting alone by myself at home or in a pub isn't something i do, if i can't get anyone to go out with i stay at home and simply watch t.v or play games.

 

Your in denial pal. Your a raging alkie :icon_mrgreen:

 

I drink loads when I'm out, binge, whatever you call it and have a few indoors at weekend but i can leave it..
My old man and old dear are alkies, drink every day without fail..

 

admit that I do like a couple of cans or bottles of lager when im relaxing at night but never more than 4 and only 2-3 times a week including weekends but if I didn't have them in the fridge it doesn't bother me .

 

Thats what my parents tell me!

 

Yip know plenty of people like this. Seems quite common to be honest.
Soon as they get home it's crack open the wine/beer/spirits. Sit there and drink, go to bed, get up, go to work, come home, drink.
That's it.
1 person i know tries to hide it from his Mrs - he has bottles of whiskey or brandy planked about the house. Fortunately for him his Mrs is disabled so she takes forever to walk anywhere so he has time to hide stuff before she gets to the kitchen.
Have noticed him tan a bottle of whiskey and a bottle of brandy in a few hours.
What doesn't help is people moan about the problem but as soon as they appear at their door for a kids birthday or dinner or whatever the first thing they say is "want a drink"?
I never offer him alcohol. Always pretend we have none even if we do.

I suspect several people who work for me are similar and i've caught one person swigging from a quarter bottle of vodka in her handbag.
I think alcoholism is more rife than we all think.

 

Nothing wrong with that mate,

As for all the above alchie * :smiley-laughing002:

 

Only thing to do is tell him it will all catch up on him and to look at himself before it does.

On a friday or saturday if I'm not going out I go and buy a chinese + 8 cans and just play the playstation or * about on the computer would that be seen as a problem thing?

If I'm working or going college in the morning I dont crave it whatsoever so it dosent feel like I'm on a * slippery slope or anything.

 

of course not

 

There are many types of alcos, I basically used drink as a stress reliever I would have binged drank after football Celtic games, weddings parties etc for about 17 years. I would drink till I was drunk usually about 10 pints in a session from the age of 17 to 34, I had no physical dependency on it. But when I was 30 hangovers got worse and I started getting The fear, this got worse gradually worse insominia after a session and anxiety. I eventually had a breakdown triggered by stress work , family etc etc. I am off it a year, it a year now, dont think I will drink again.
It will catch up with you at some point. unfortunatly