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1 for the ladies

Discussion in 'TalkCeltic Pub' started by bigbhoy77, Apr 17, 2006.

Discuss 1 for the ladies in the TalkCeltic Pub area at TalkCeltic.net.

  1. bigbhoy77

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    Location:
    Glesga
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Jinky, Henke, JC, Paul Elliott
    Fav Celtic Song:
    Walk on
    A bloke goes up to a bird in a club and says....... The name's Bond! She replies "let me guess, James Bond" He says " No! Unibond" I've come to fill yer crack!:celt_2:
     
  2. Eamonnhenrik

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    LOL good un mate not sure if the ladies will like it though
     
  3. bigbhoy77

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    Fav Celtic Player:
    Jinky, Henke, JC, Paul Elliott
    Fav Celtic Song:
    Walk on
    wot the joke or me filling there cracks?:86:
     
  4. Eamonnhenrik

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    lol the joke + you didnt say it was you you said some bloke lol ;)
     
  5. bigbhoy77

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    Location:
    Glesga
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Jinky, Henke, JC, Paul Elliott
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    Walk on
    didnt want to admit it lol
     
  6. Rosco67

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    Location:
    Dumfries, Scotland
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Big Bobo Balde
    Fav Celtic Song:
    YNWA
    That was a classic!!:56:
     
  7. come_on_the_hoops

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Béal Feirste
    Fav Celtic Song:
    All of them
    haha

    Chat up lines gone bad lol (This is an email from one of my mates, couldn't tell you if it was him that used them or not :D)

    Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
    Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
    Man: Really? I heard it was because everyone there calls you a fat *.

    Man: Is this seat empty?
    Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
    Man: There's no need to get on your knees and suck on my c&^% just yet

    Man: Your place or mine?
    Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
    Man: That's cool, cause after I'm done * you in the back of my car, I don't give a * where you go.

    Man: So, what do you do for a living?
    Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
    Man: That explains the moustache then!

    (CLASSIC!!!!)
    Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
    Woman: Unfertilized.
    Man: No problem, I'll just shoot my load up your *.

    Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
    Woman: But would you stay there?
    Man: Probably, cause you seem like the kind of chick that is
    impossible to shake off once you've been shagged.

    Man: Would you like to dance?
    Woman: I'd rather eat glass.
    Man: I think you mis-heard me. I said you look fat in those pants.

    Man: Where have you been all my life?
    Woman: Fortunately, somewhere else.
    Man: Just as well cos I've been * your mum while your dad watches.

    Man: You're pretty
    Woman: * off.
    Man: Don't interrupt, You're pretty... ugly, you fat *.


    :56: :56:
     
  8. Sarah46

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    Location:
    Kilwinning
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Aiden McGeady nd Neil Lennon
    oh ha!
     
  9. come_on_the_hoops

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    Location:
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    All of them
    What? didn't like them?

    Sorry Love!! :54:

    :56:
     
  10. derryduck

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    Location:
    Doire
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Neil Lennon, Naka
    Fav Celtic Song:
    Willie Maley
    Laughed my * off big time!!!!!! Reminded me of Sidney Smutt if any of you remember him from Viz!
     
  11. Rosco67

    Joined:
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    Location:
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    Fav Celtic Player:
    Big Bobo Balde
    Fav Celtic Song:
    YNWA
    Got to laugh at them. At least you know that their is good back up if a girl knock backs your cheesy chat up line:84:
     
  12. Eamonnhenrik

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    lol theyre class mst email them 2 the lads itll come in handy for 1 of my mates lol
     
  13. louise

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    :rofl: sum o them wer gud!
     
  14. jazcelticfan

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    Location:
    In a wheely bin. It even has windows which a made
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Mcgeady
    Fav Celtic Song:
    I'm not much of a singer
    Haha there quality.
     
  15. come_on_the_hoops

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    Location:
    Béal Feirste
    Fav Celtic Song:
    All of them
    I know, some of them are crackers, I couldn't stop laughing at them!!