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Sugar daddy fantasy

Discussion in 'Celtic Chat' started by LectersLuncheon, Mar 18, 2019.

Discuss Sugar daddy fantasy in the Celtic Chat area at TalkCeltic.net.

  1. LectersLuncheon

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    Sorry about the title lol.

    Had this hypothetical convo last night with a few lads.

    Scenario: you are now the sugar daddy majority share holder at celtic. You have have literally billions to spend (ffp however is still in effect). What would your plans for us be?

    Firstly, Id raise the south stand tiers up to create a single 2 tier bowl. Expand rail seating to the entire lower jock stein stand. Id also have a retractable roof installed for the winter. The "piping" around the stadium id have scrapped or at least used as a frame to build over it. Id also have a season ticket holder survey to decide at least 4 new statues to built around the ground with one for henke a must... And classically created, none of this beckham/ ronaldo statue * where they look like * circus freaks.

    Id raise our playing wage cap by 30k and and increase the annual tranfer budget to 75% of our post tax profit. Lennoxtown would be expanded to include a sports science campus and all training surfaces would have hybrid grass installed.

    Id would also "gift" spl clubs a financial stipend for stadium and training facility redevelopment, but this would only be applicable to teams that have not suffered relegation or administration in the past 10 years.

    Ahhh if only. Do * still play euro millions over there?

    Any other ideas?
     
  2. Pacific Ocean Blue

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    Wid yi aye?
     
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  3. Mr. Slippyfist

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    Sugar daddy fantasy title + creepy pervy hannibal lector photie = something sinister
     
  4. LectersLuncheon

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    [​IMG]
     
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  5. Callum McGregor The Captain Gold Member

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    More disco lights and no new signings. Loans only. Finally, a heated driveway for my hoose in Thorntonhall.
     
  6. Random Review

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    My fantasy?

    I'd create a constitution of sorts for us. I would engage a legal team to enable me to do that effectively. Their brief would be to create something like the following:

    1) Create some sort of governing body to run the club.
    2) This governing body should be made of 1/4 businesspeople, 1/4 Celtic greats that have the club at heart and 1/2 fan-elected representatives.
    3) The business side of the club should be given absolute control over the financial running of the club and any financial negotiations, such as contracts, transfer fees, etc..
    4) Try to engage Lawwell et al to stay on in that capacity, but probably they would turn us down due to the loss of power. So be it. There are other skilled businesspeople in Scotland.
    5) Any non-financial decisions and negotiations to be taken by the governing body (mentioned in point 1) as a whole.
    6) A fixed, percentage of turnover ring-fenced to go to the academy and the charity side of the club. This doesn't mean the governing body cannot decide to invest more in the academy or give more to charity in any given year.
    7) When it comes to electing fan representatives, the purchase of a season ticket is what entitles you to a single vote; purchasing further season tickets will not entitle you to further votes.
    8) To avoid abuse (people buying tickets in the name of other people in order to use their vote), fans will have to attend at least 67% of season ticket games or lose their voting rights and voting will be done in person with a passport or other suitable ID. Exceptions will obviously be made to the above for fans who are registered disabled.
    9) The right to a living wage for all employees and all agency staff and staff employed by subcontractors written into our constitution.
    10) The commitment to defend the right of freedom of political expression at Celtic park. The rebs would come under that commitment; chanting DOB would not.

    I can dream.
     
    Last edited: Mar 18, 2019
  7. King of Kings

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  8. MagnificentSeven Charly Musonda CSC

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    Would love a sugar daddy to spit on me & tell me I’m a bad boy.


    Edit - Wrong thread.
     
  9. CookieMonster Geez yer cookies Gold Member

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    Expand and upgrade stadium
    Buy the City of Glasgow council and paint Govan green & white
    Invest heavily in the Lennoxtown and build a small local stadium for the youth team.
    Invest in the scouting and youth scouts.
    Hire the guy that wanted to start sonic sound attacks
    Pay for VAR for the Spfl and training for it but only for Catholic refs.
     
  10. Creativecelt Gold Member Gold Member

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    Great ideas. I would vote for YOU.
     
  11. Creativecelt Gold Member Gold Member

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    Improve the stadium. adding another tier to the south stand, when take our capacity up to maybe 75K? Hopefully the biggest club in the UK.
    Invest Heavily in YOUTH academies throughout UK and Ireland.
    Bring in Ex Players and highly promising coaches to coach the kids.
    Build the Hotel. and purchase all the sports venues around the ground and create a Sports Mecca, covering as many sports and activities as possible. Giving all kids under the age of 18 free automatic access to these sports facilities.
     
  12. Buster

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    l've got an Instant Access savings account you little * :93:
     
  13. MagnificentSeven Charly Musonda CSC

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    :56: Actually laughed out loud there & tried explaining it to my Mrs.

    I’m single now.
     
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  14. honda Gold Member Gold Member

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    Probably be found dead in the boardroom in a frenzy of world class hookers n coke.
     
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  15. Buster

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    If you can make them laugh it makes it easier to pump them later :34: :giggle1:
     
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  16. bhoy81

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    Created a new company with another family members of friend as CEO like City has done and be the new main sponsor of the ground, keep the name the same and use the same company as the kit sponsor and pump millions into the club that way to bend the rules like them * down south.

    Set up better youth league throughout Scotland with coaching training in place and subsidies placements for someone of the poorest areas in Scotland as they have a fighting chance to prove themselves.

    Offer better education in relation to Football colleges and offer retraining if they can’t make it.

    Or go to Vegas and put it all on red or black. Can’t make my mind up.

    What was the question again?
     
  17. StainseyBhoy

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    Free season tickets, but you're fined £50 per game for each one you don't attend. Miss 10 games and you're paying around £500 for a season book, which is about average at the moment. Real fans get to attend every game for free. People who just want to attend the big games can pay more for the privilege.
    You can always give your ticket to someone else to ensure every game is a sell out.
     
  18. Jeremie Frimpong

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    I would build a new 80,000 capacity stadium (at the same location, of course, but further away from the necropolis than Celtic Park is now, so that the architecture isn't compromised), a new training ground with state-of-the-art indoor and outdoor facilities, and a new fan zone around Celtic Park (with a bar, a hotel, and a museum). I would also redevelop the local area.

    Inside the stadium, I would have a safe-standing stand, like Borussia Dortmund's Südtribüne; each season ticket for that stand would come with a year's supply of pyrotechnics, and arts and crafts supplies. There would, of course, be disco lights.

    I would ensure that we have the best coaching staff, scouting network and youth academy in world football.

    I would support the Celtic Foundation, and, generally, make sure that the club was upholding it's social responsibilities.

    Finally, I would buy the broadcasting rights for Scottish football for an exorbitant sum of money in order to improve Celtic and Scottish football as a whole, and, in turn, lower ticket prices.

    (Oh, and Scarlett Johansson would replace Tom Boyd as a co-commentator on Celtic TV.)
     
  19. dbhoy72

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    If it was me, fk signing Ronaldo, Messi and the likes...…….I'd do this. Not for winter,though.

    Disco lights, roof closed and v Rangers...…

     
  20. LectersLuncheon

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    I wouldnt have that zionist apartheid facilitating bint anywhere near cp.

    Rest of its class though;)