Helpful Everyday Tips

Discussion in 'TalkCeltic Pub' started by Sean Daleer, Oct 25, 2017.

Discuss Helpful Everyday Tips in the TalkCeltic Pub area at TalkCeltic.net.

  1. CymruBhoy

    CymruBhoy Flag of St.David.

    Joined:
    Feb 17, 2012
    Messages:
    3,530
    Likes Received:
    2,787
    Location:
    Wrexham.
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Jinky.
    Fav Celtic Song:
    Let the people sing.
    If you have a ‘lady of the night’ around, avoid being busted by the police for solicitation by filming your performance. Prostitution is a crime, pornography isn’t.
     
    jamesfr likes this.
  2. Jack Torrance

    Jack Torrance Heeeere's Johnny! Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 16, 2013
    Messages:
    20,459
    Likes Received:
    2,720
    Location:
    The Overlook Hotel
    Fav Celtic Song:
    Celtic Symphony
    You have to be willing to get happy about nothing.

    A. Warhol
     
  3. ChrisMoh

    ChrisMoh Banned!

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2009
    Messages:
    5,163
    Likes Received:
    826
    Location:
    Glasgow
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Samaras
    Fav Celtic Song:
    YNWA
    use poppers when having sex,heightens the orgasm by 20x times.be warned though the stuff now in the uk is weak and can cause blindness.
     
  4. StevieBhoooy!

    StevieBhoooy!

    Joined:
    Jun 18, 2012
    Messages:
    5,290
    Likes Received:
    1,677
    Found a hedgehog in your garden?

    Get some exercise and clear those autumn leaves at the same time by
    getting some mates round and playing hedgehog football.

    A tidy garden and feeling fitter in one go!

    You're welcome! :50:
     
  5. PaulM1888

    PaulM1888 Gold Member Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 8, 2007
    Messages:
    49,378
    Likes Received:
    4,434
    If you’ve got a hole in a pair of black socks, save money by just colouring in your toenail with a black permy.
     
  6. Jax Teller

    Jax Teller SAMCRO

    Joined:
    Apr 27, 2013
    Messages:
    3,492
    Likes Received:
    2,426
    Location:
    Charming
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Thumb
    Fav Celtic Song:
    Soldier song
    Dont want to buy christmas gifts?

    Start falling out with friends and family now so as not to arouse suspicion.
     
  7. Buster

    Buster Yer clubs deid, beat it Gold Member

    Joined:
    Feb 4, 2010
    Messages:
    11,881
    Likes Received:
    1,585
    I'm sure this thread was started with good intentions...........turning out to be one of the funniest :50:
     
  8. joemc

    joemc

    Joined:
    Apr 10, 2009
    Messages:
    2,827
    Likes Received:
    242
    Will try this at muff bay next time :67:
     
  9. cidermaster

    cidermaster

    Joined:
    May 19, 2014
    Messages:
    8,549
    Likes Received:
    2,463
    Location:
    North Wales
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Henrik Larsson
    Fav Celtic Song:
    That Depeche Mode when we score!!
    I have said this more than vital advice before but NEVER lemon your fool,never!!

    Also never squirt Ketchup at a Siberian Wild Boar!
     
    Mr Monaghan likes this.
  10. packybhoy

    packybhoy Gold Member Staff Member Gold Member Super Moderator

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2011
    Messages:
    17,875
    Likes Received:
    7,150
    Location:
    In your heart
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Danny McGrain
    Whilst planning to redecorate, DO NOT strip your old wallpaper off around children. You will only come in one day to find the new wallpaper half stripped because kids think they're helping.:88:
     
    Sean Daleer likes this.
  11. FATLAZYBHOY

    FATLAZYBHOY Born in the steamie Gold Member

    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2011
    Messages:
    8,678
    Likes Received:
    1,081
    Location:
    Here and there
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Rafael shite
    Fav Celtic Song:
    CELTIC SONG (CLASSIC)
    when shitting in the woods make sure you wipe with a dock leaf and not stinging nettles.
     
  12. Scotia

    Scotia aul moanin bassa Gold Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2007
    Messages:
    13,586
    Likes Received:
    1,714
    Location:
    here and there
    Fav Celtic Player:
    you wear the hoops thats good enough
    Fav Celtic Song:
    over and over
    also don't when painting a room dont give her a wee brush and tell her to paint in a corner ....... sure as fek when you take your eye off her , later when you put her to bed and turn the light on in her room ....... guess , and its fekkin dry .
     
  13. rendog

    rendog Gold Member Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jul 27, 2006
    Messages:
    11,936
    Likes Received:
    888
    Location:
    Philadelphia museum of art
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Kieran Tierney
    Fav Celtic Song:
    The SAM song
    Never take your bank card with you on a night out. Work out how much you need beforehand and bring cash.
     
  14. Tim-Time 1888

    Tim-Time 1888 Winner UEFA Champs League Last 16 prediction comp Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 19, 2012
    Messages:
    21,069
    Likes Received:
    2,455
    Location:
    North East, Scotland
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Enrico Annoni
    Fav Celtic Song:
    Hail Hail

    OR just don't go to the strip club if you have any cards with you :giggle1:
     
    CalgaryBhoy likes this.
  15. Idioteque

    Idioteque Gold Member Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 7, 2010
    Messages:
    5,734
    Likes Received:
    1,319
    Location:
    East London
    952D13BC-03A8-4C28-8642-5EC3720FA064.jpeg

    Spring from a pen to prevent your charger cable falling apart. Only negative is your down a pen
     
  16. MagnificentSeven

    MagnificentSeven

    Joined:
    Aug 13, 2017
    Messages:
    281
    Likes Received:
    345
    Location:
    Glasgow
    It’s no gay if it’s Kieran Tierney.
     
  17. Senna s1979

    Senna s1979 Malcolm in the Middle Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2010
    Messages:
    6,682
    Likes Received:
    1,140
    Location:
    Kent
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Danny McGrain
    Always use cold water to wash egg and/or jizz off anything. Hot water causes it to coagulate and is harder to remove.

    On your iPhone unlock screen the bit that says ‘Emergency’ isnt for ringing the police it’s for anyone who finds your phone with or without you next to it to contact someone in an emergency without the need to unlock your phone. Assign your wife/family member/local barkeep/whoever would miss you most as this contact.
     
  18. cfcturbo

    cfcturbo

    Joined:
    Jun 21, 2009
    Messages:
    586
    Likes Received:
    52
    Location:
    Ireland
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Thomas burns
    Fav Celtic Song:
    Skibereen by wolfe tones
    Thread should be changed to TALKTIPS
     
  19. cfcturbo

    cfcturbo

    Joined:
    Jun 21, 2009
    Messages:
    586
    Likes Received:
    52
    Location:
    Ireland
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Thomas burns
    Fav Celtic Song:
    Skibereen by wolfe tones
    Same applies to your toli in the pan
     
  20. Our Eddie

    Our Eddie Sometimes we lose our way Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 20, 2013
    Messages:
    14,743
    Likes Received:
    1,352
    Location:
    Tallaght, Dublin
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Griff
    If you're in a world cup play off second leg with Denmark and you're winning 1-0 don't concede 5 goals.