1. Having trouble logging in by clicking the link at the top right of the page? Click here to be taken to the log in page.
    Dismiss Notice

Helpful Everyday Tips

Discussion in 'TalkCeltic Pub' started by Sean Daleer, Oct 25, 2017.

Discuss Helpful Everyday Tips in the TalkCeltic Pub area at TalkCeltic.net.

  1. CymruBhoy

    Joined:
    Feb 17, 2012
    Messages:
    4,163
    Likes Received:
    3,922
    Location:
    Wrexham.
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Jinky.
    Fav Celtic Song:
    Let the people sing.
    If you have a ‘lady of the night’ around, avoid being busted by the police for solicitation by filming your performance. Prostitution is a crime, * isn’t.
     
    jamesfr likes this.
  2. Jack Torrance Heeeeeere's Johnny! Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 16, 2013
    Messages:
    24,274
    Likes Received:
    7,216
    Location:
    The Overlook Hotel
    You have to be willing to get happy about nothing.

    A. Warhol
     
  3. ChrisMoh

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2009
    Messages:
    7,310
    Likes Received:
    1,818
    Location:
    Glasgow
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Samaras
    Fav Celtic Song:
    YNWA
    use poppers when having *,heightens the * by 20x times.be warned though the stuff now in the uk is weak and can cause blindness.
     
  4. StevieBhoooy!

    Joined:
    Jun 18, 2012
    Messages:
    21,255
    Likes Received:
    24,013
    Found a hedgehog in your garden?

    Get some exercise and clear those autumn leaves at the same time by
    getting some mates round and playing hedgehog football.

    A tidy garden and feeling fitter in one go!

    You're welcome! :50:
     
  5. PaulM1888 Moderator Moderator Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 8, 2007
    Messages:
    69,282
    Likes Received:
    32,973
    If you’ve got a hole in a pair of black socks, save money by just colouring in your toenail with a black permy.
     
  6. Jax Teller

    Joined:
    Apr 27, 2013
    Messages:
    6,972
    Likes Received:
    9,338
    Location:
    Charming
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Thumb
    Fav Celtic Song:
    Soldier song
    Dont want to buy christmas gifts?

    Start falling out with friends and family now so as not to arouse suspicion.
     
  7. Buster

    Joined:
    Feb 4, 2010
    Messages:
    18,101
    Likes Received:
    20,122
    I'm sure this thread was started with good intentions...........turning out to be one of the funniest :50:
     
  8. joemc

    Joined:
    Apr 10, 2009
    Messages:
    6,350
    Likes Received:
    2,081
    Will try this at * bay next time :67:
     
  9. cidermaster Gold Member Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 19, 2014
    Messages:
    23,194
    Likes Received:
    19,033
    Location:
    North Wales
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Henrik Larsson
    Fav Celtic Song:
    That Depeche Mode when we score!!
    I have said this more than vital advice before but NEVER lemon your fool,never!!

    Also never squirt Ketchup at a Siberian Wild Boar!
     
    Mr Shelby likes this.
  10. packybhoy Administrator Administrator Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2011
    Messages:
    39,051
    Likes Received:
    32,682
    Location:
    In your heart
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Danny McGrain
    Whilst planning to redecorate, DO NOT strip your old wallpaper off around children. You will only come in one day to find the new wallpaper half stripped because kids think they're helping.:88:
     
    Sean Daleer likes this.
  11. FATLAZYBHOY Born in the steamie Gold Member

    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2011
    Messages:
    12,938
    Likes Received:
    5,837
    Location:
    Glasgow
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Samaras
    Fav Celtic Song:
    CELTIC SONG (CLASSIC)
    when * in the woods make sure you wipe with a dock leaf and not stinging nettles.
     
  12. Scotia Gold Member Gold Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2007
    Messages:
    26,304
    Likes Received:
    19,624
    Location:
    here and there
    Fav Celtic Player:
    you wear the hoops thats good enough
    Fav Celtic Song:
    over and over
    also don't when painting a room dont give her a wee brush and tell her to paint in a corner ....... sure as fek when you take your eye off her , later when you put her to bed and turn the light on in her room ....... guess , and its fekkin dry .
     
  13. Rendog

    Joined:
    Jul 27, 2006
    Messages:
    14,061
    Likes Received:
    2,567
    Location:
    Philadelphia museum of art
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Kieran Tierney
    Fav Celtic Song:
    The SAM song
    Never take your bank card with you on a night out. Work out how much you need beforehand and bring cash.
     
  14. Tim-Time 1888 Always look on the bright side of Life Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 19, 2012
    Messages:
    32,400
    Likes Received:
    11,212
    Location:
    Scotland
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Enrico Annoni
    Fav Celtic Song:
    Hail Hail

    OR just don't go to the strip club if you have any cards with you :giggle1:
     
    CalgaryBhoy likes this.
  15. Idioteque I’ll laugh until my head comes off

    Joined:
    May 7, 2010
    Messages:
    12,150
    Likes Received:
    7,002
    Location:
    East London
    952D13BC-03A8-4C28-8642-5EC3720FA064.jpeg

    Spring from a pen to prevent your charger cable falling apart. Only negative is your down a pen
     
  16. MagnificentSeven Charly Musonda CSC

    Joined:
    Aug 13, 2017
    Messages:
    4,280
    Likes Received:
    12,008
    Location:
    Glasgow
    It’s no gay if it’s Kieran Tierney.
     
  17. Senna s1979

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2010
    Messages:
    8,876
    Likes Received:
    4,854
    Location:
    Kent
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Danny McGrain
    Always use cold water to wash egg and/or * off anything. Hot water causes it to coagulate and is harder to remove.

    On your iPhone unlock screen the bit that says ‘Emergency’ isnt for ringing the police it’s for anyone who finds your phone with or without you next to it to contact someone in an emergency without the need to unlock your phone. Assign your wife/family member/local barkeep/whoever would miss you most as this contact.
     
  18. cfcturbo

    Joined:
    Jun 21, 2009
    Messages:
    1,830
    Likes Received:
    996
    Location:
    Ireland
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Thomas burns
    Fav Celtic Song:
    Skibereen by wolfe tones
    Thread should be changed to TALKTIPS
     
  19. cfcturbo

    Joined:
    Jun 21, 2009
    Messages:
    1,830
    Likes Received:
    996
    Location:
    Ireland
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Thomas burns
    Fav Celtic Song:
    Skibereen by wolfe tones
    Same applies to your toli in the pan
     
  20. M.E.T.H.O.D MAN Straight from the slums of Shaolin

    Joined:
    Jun 20, 2013
    Messages:
    0
    Likes Received:
    7
    Location:
    Shaolin
    If you're in a world cup play off second leg with Denmark and you're winning 1-0 don't concede 5 goals.