Learning from the movies

[Murdi]

Isn't it great what you learn watching movies?

1. Large, loft-style apartments in New York City are well within the price range of most people - whether they are employed or not.

2. At least one of a pair of identical twins is born evil.

3. Should you decide to defuse a bomb, don't worry which wire to cut. You will always choose the right one.

4. Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communications system of any invading alien society.

5. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts; your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.

6. When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your bedroom will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish.

7. If you are a blonde and pretty, it is possible to become a world expert on nuclear fission at the age of 22.

8. Honest and hardworking policemen are traditionally gunned down three days before their retirement.

9. Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their archenemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gasses, lasers, and man eating sharks, which will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape.

10. All beds have special L-shaped cover sheets that reach the armpit level on a woman, but only to the waist level on the man lying beside her.

11. All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French bread.

12. It's easy for anyone to land a plane, provided there is someone in the control tower.

13. Once applied, lipstick will never rub off - even while scuba diving

14. You're very likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.

15. Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German or Russian officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German or Russian accent will do.

16. The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris.

17. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating, but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.

18. If a large pane of glass is visible, someone will be thrown through it before long.

19. If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noise in their most revealing underwear.

20. Word processors never display a cursor on the screen but will always say: "Enter password now."

21. Even when driving down a perfectly straight road, it is necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments.

22. All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readout's so you know exactly when they're going to go off.

23. A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.

24. If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you meet will know all the steps.

25. Police departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is the total opposite.

26. When they are alone, all foreign military officers prefer to speak to each other in English.

[celticmad117]

R watching tv programs like simpson
TV dosnt have 2 make sense

[Martin]

Originally Posted by Murdi

Isn't it great what you learn watching movies?

1. Large, loft-style apartments in New York City are well within the price range of most people - whether they are employed or not.

2. At least one of a pair of identical twins is born evil.

3. Should you decide to defuse a bomb, don't worry which wire to cut. You will always choose the right one.

4. Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communications system of any invading alien society.

5. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts; your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.

6. When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your bedroom will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish.

7. If you are a blonde and pretty, it is possible to become a world expert on nuclear fission at the age of 22.

8. Honest and hardworking policemen are traditionally gunned down three days before their retirement.

9. Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their archenemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gasses, lasers, and man eating sharks, which will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape.

10. All beds have special L-shaped cover sheets that reach the armpit level on a woman, but only to the waist level on the man lying beside her.

11. All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French bread.

12. It's easy for anyone to land a plane, provided there is someone in the control tower.

13. Once applied, lipstick will never rub off - even while scuba diving

14. You're very likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.

15. Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German or Russian officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German or Russian accent will do.

16. The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris.

17. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating, but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.

18. If a large pane of glass is visible, someone will be thrown through it before long.

19. If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noise in their most revealing underwear.

20. Word processors never display a cursor on the screen but will always say: "Enter password now."

21. Even when driving down a perfectly straight road, it is necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments.

22. All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readout's so you know exactly when they're going to go off.

23. A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.

24. If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you meet will know all the steps.

25. Police departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is the total opposite.

26. When they are alone, all foreign military officers prefer to speak to each other in English.

All of this is true Murdi, and in a way there is something sad about it but it also shows that we still need that "cinematic experience", that dose of escapism. That has been true of all peoples throughout history. Perhaps the problem is that we live in a time when we have far too much escapism. Nevertheless the cinema, for me, is a good way to get your dose of escapism. It is a communal thing too and I think that is important. It is a different experience to see a movie in a cinema than on dvd at home. Who can forget the first time they say Rocky ? Jaws ? Schindler's List?. The movies fulfill a need in us, a need for myths, legends and lore. I love movies. I love big movies. It's the other stuff - the shite that pretends to be real - that I have a problem with, Big Brother for example.

[Murdi]

Pure escapism is what a good movie provides. It works as an antidote for all the garbage on TV that purports to be entertainment. As you say, Martin, the cinema gives a film that something extra that is missing when sitting in your front room.

[Martin]

Originally Posted by Murdi

Pure escapism is what a good movie provides. It works as an antidote for all the garbage on TV that purports to be entertainment. As you say, Martin, the cinema gives a film that something extra that is missing when sitting in your front room.

Another great cinema movie, and I am surprised that I rate it so much, was Fatal Attraction. It was a real "couples movie" and after every dramatic scene there was a murmur around the audience as couples took their respective gender's side in the movie. It was an enjoyable movie. I have a bit of time for Michael Douglas a lot of his movies are at least "about" something, and often something uncomfortable - Wall Street, Falling Down. I love his dad as an actor too.

[oasisgurl]

when i watched american pie the wedding i learned to never do anythin naughty in a resteraunt

[Martin]

Originally Posted by kim the tim

when i watched american pie the wedding i learned to never do anythin naughty in a resteraunt

Yes it's a useful thing to remember.

[Murdi]

Originally Posted by Martin

Another great cinema movie, and I am surprised that I rate it so much, was Fatal Attraction. It was a real "couples movie" and after every dramatic scene there was a murmur around the audience as couples took their respective gender's side in the movie. It was an enjoyable movie. I have a bit of time for Michael Douglas a lot of his movies are at least "about" something, and often something uncomfortable - Wall Street, Falling Down. I love his dad as an actor too.

Kirk Douglas, Burt Lancaster et al. Now they were real movie stars.